The end is near… Darkness flows closer to my thoughts and memories. Destruction and dissolutions follow me… the end is drawing closer to my every thought. Beware of lucid dreams of time gone by, they are nothing but lies trying to pull you closer in to a dream that will never arise.
PkS 2004
Sunday, March 28, 2004
Saturday, March 27, 2004
Sleep? Whats sleep? Anyone got the answer? Me??? Sleep??? never sleep... Insomnia holds me tight, that and the bed bugs that continually bite!
IF you see one of the men in the Trench coats, that put up signs for lost animals... please tell them I'm waiting for my ride. They are late for their appointment, but who knows, Roland must be keeping them tired up. Anways, I will sit and wait, wait and sit, for the trench coated men to show up at my door.
Sleep well my young preys....
IF you see one of the men in the Trench coats, that put up signs for lost animals... please tell them I'm waiting for my ride. They are late for their appointment, but who knows, Roland must be keeping them tired up. Anways, I will sit and wait, wait and sit, for the trench coated men to show up at my door.
Sleep well my young preys....
Femme Violence
Femme Violence
Find me once lying on the bathroom floor
Find me twice kicked like the trash out the door
Find me a third time wondering down the street
Find me dead as I lay upon your feet
Thinking of me when you had me in your hands
Thinking of me as you beat me to shallow breath none the less
Thinking of me as you tortured my mind
Thinking of me as you slit my throat with a sharpened edge knife
Slap me senseless with marks to show the world
Slap me endlessness to show your power and growth
Slap me violently to the ground soaking in blood
Slap me repeatedly for no certain care, reason or whim
Beat me to deaths beckoned end
Beat me till my blood run thin
Beat me repeatedly till my last breath is gone
Beat me restlessly, continue with your fun
PkS © 2003
Note – These comments are the particular views of the writer, either from personal experience of her own or a way to release aggression, using a format of writing. The comments suggested above are not in anyway stating that violence is acceptable, in any standards. It is the view of the writer that the violence stated above should be read as fiction and should not be portrayed as an actual event(s). The writer holds no responsibilities, nor knowledge of events, if the above statement should coincide with personal experience(s) of the reader.
Find me once lying on the bathroom floor
Find me twice kicked like the trash out the door
Find me a third time wondering down the street
Find me dead as I lay upon your feet
Thinking of me when you had me in your hands
Thinking of me as you beat me to shallow breath none the less
Thinking of me as you tortured my mind
Thinking of me as you slit my throat with a sharpened edge knife
Slap me senseless with marks to show the world
Slap me endlessness to show your power and growth
Slap me violently to the ground soaking in blood
Slap me repeatedly for no certain care, reason or whim
Beat me to deaths beckoned end
Beat me till my blood run thin
Beat me repeatedly till my last breath is gone
Beat me restlessly, continue with your fun
PkS © 2003
Note – These comments are the particular views of the writer, either from personal experience of her own or a way to release aggression, using a format of writing. The comments suggested above are not in anyway stating that violence is acceptable, in any standards. It is the view of the writer that the violence stated above should be read as fiction and should not be portrayed as an actual event(s). The writer holds no responsibilities, nor knowledge of events, if the above statement should coincide with personal experience(s) of the reader.
Bored
~ Bored~
Bitch and moan all you want...... I'm so bored with what you got…
Bored with the rhythm of the afternoon
Bored with the oceans that are blue
Bored with the careless acts
Bored with the threats and attacks
Bored with the answers
More so bored with the questions that repeat the answers
Bored with the notation of things are fair
Bored with the thought that I just don’t care
Bored with the actions of careless ways
Bored with the freedom that people portray
Bored with the problems of the world
Bored with the standards we so adore
Bored with the careful ways we have to act
Bored with the faces that have turned black
Bored with the cries you only hear in the dark
Bored with the “coming of our savor” religion talk
Bored with how it once was
Bored with how it’s turning out
Bored again with the same old song and dance
Bored with roads that take you no where
Bored with the small mindedness that lurks everywhere
Bored with the intelligence that people show
Bored because they are so friggen slow
Bored with how proper you have to be
Bored with the stamp of being approval meat
Bored how we treat each other
Bored with the pathetic games we do onto others
Bored with how careless we have become
Bored even with the rhythm of the sun
Bitch and moan all you want…. I’m so fucking bored with what you’ve shown…
PkS © 2004
Bitch and moan all you want...... I'm so bored with what you got…
Bored with the rhythm of the afternoon
Bored with the oceans that are blue
Bored with the careless acts
Bored with the threats and attacks
Bored with the answers
More so bored with the questions that repeat the answers
Bored with the notation of things are fair
Bored with the thought that I just don’t care
Bored with the actions of careless ways
Bored with the freedom that people portray
Bored with the problems of the world
Bored with the standards we so adore
Bored with the careful ways we have to act
Bored with the faces that have turned black
Bored with the cries you only hear in the dark
Bored with the “coming of our savor” religion talk
Bored with how it once was
Bored with how it’s turning out
Bored again with the same old song and dance
Bored with roads that take you no where
Bored with the small mindedness that lurks everywhere
Bored with the intelligence that people show
Bored because they are so friggen slow
Bored with how proper you have to be
Bored with the stamp of being approval meat
Bored how we treat each other
Bored with the pathetic games we do onto others
Bored with how careless we have become
Bored even with the rhythm of the sun
Bitch and moan all you want…. I’m so fucking bored with what you’ve shown…
PkS © 2004
Friday, March 26, 2004
Flinch
~Flinch~
What, it’s been over a decade since we meet.... It still feels like it was yesterday..... we only knew what was going on between each other.... we only bruised each other but the pain still is floating around in each of us.... you made me run and hide.... you made me retreat to a hidden place in my head.... you bite, you slapped, you fought with your fists, you kicked, you always made sure that the marks were not seen except by you.... proud of your art work, you took so much pride in it..... Bragging to your buddies on what a great man you were.... how long can a girl be tortured by you..... How long can a girl be haunted by you..... How long does it take before all the pain goes away.....you thought by just dropping in every once in a while that all would be forgiven..... You thought that going away as I asked would only make me want you again.... but you were sadly mistaken..... you didn't see it coming...... you didn't see that I learned to shut myself off to you.....even when you still held me down, you could not get close enough to make a difference.....you thought that if you stopped my heart may return, but you were sadly mistaken once again.... you threaten and stalked, you even decided to make good on a promise..... but after all that you did, broke as I am, you still can not get what you want out of me.....the acceptance that you desire, the love that you require, the trust and emotions that you think you need..... you took what should have been memories and turned them all into hate, devastation, boredom, and confusion......I always wanted for you want you wanted for yourself.... but we both knew from the start that neither one of us should be in the place we ended up..... Now the final chapter is closed, but yet the pain still lingers around..... Afraid of stepping out, without looking behind me, not trusting anyone because of what actions my lay ahead..... yes, thank you for breaking me down, for all your wonderful work you have done.... you have left me broken, but you still lost the battle, you still lost the war, you never gained what you always wanted, you never could get into my heart.... and yes thank you for your marks you left, I added a few of my own, but they are there just for me to remember what path not to follow again.....And even though we I sat for months and vacillated, I just took it all in, let you continue and still you are the one you has lost everything.....
~PkS
2002 ©
I wrote this to cleanse myself of the torture I had allowed into my life. The sorrow, the demise, the hate and most of all the insanity of allowing myself to get to a point of becoming hollow inside. The one thing I have learned since I have written the above paragraph is that you have several different paths you can take in life. You can choice your own path, you make your own decisions, but when you continually have your past as your path, you can not direct yourself in the right direction. Time has proven to me that memories may fade but they do not die, the pain will follow you, no matter what you do to forget it. Horror is the factor, pain is the product and destruction of ones self is the ultimate pleasure to gain. You are nothing more than chest piece that is moved from moment to moment until you realize that you are not the one in control. Life allows you to choice, yes, but it also allows you to destroy much more in half the time.
Torture, where I live now, is allowing yourself to continue in ways you can not control. Continuing is destruction if the cycle can not be broken. Destruction is my disease, the ultimate demise of ones soul.
PkS © 2004
What, it’s been over a decade since we meet.... It still feels like it was yesterday..... we only knew what was going on between each other.... we only bruised each other but the pain still is floating around in each of us.... you made me run and hide.... you made me retreat to a hidden place in my head.... you bite, you slapped, you fought with your fists, you kicked, you always made sure that the marks were not seen except by you.... proud of your art work, you took so much pride in it..... Bragging to your buddies on what a great man you were.... how long can a girl be tortured by you..... How long can a girl be haunted by you..... How long does it take before all the pain goes away.....you thought by just dropping in every once in a while that all would be forgiven..... You thought that going away as I asked would only make me want you again.... but you were sadly mistaken..... you didn't see it coming...... you didn't see that I learned to shut myself off to you.....even when you still held me down, you could not get close enough to make a difference.....you thought that if you stopped my heart may return, but you were sadly mistaken once again.... you threaten and stalked, you even decided to make good on a promise..... but after all that you did, broke as I am, you still can not get what you want out of me.....the acceptance that you desire, the love that you require, the trust and emotions that you think you need..... you took what should have been memories and turned them all into hate, devastation, boredom, and confusion......I always wanted for you want you wanted for yourself.... but we both knew from the start that neither one of us should be in the place we ended up..... Now the final chapter is closed, but yet the pain still lingers around..... Afraid of stepping out, without looking behind me, not trusting anyone because of what actions my lay ahead..... yes, thank you for breaking me down, for all your wonderful work you have done.... you have left me broken, but you still lost the battle, you still lost the war, you never gained what you always wanted, you never could get into my heart.... and yes thank you for your marks you left, I added a few of my own, but they are there just for me to remember what path not to follow again.....And even though we I sat for months and vacillated, I just took it all in, let you continue and still you are the one you has lost everything.....
~PkS
2002 ©
I wrote this to cleanse myself of the torture I had allowed into my life. The sorrow, the demise, the hate and most of all the insanity of allowing myself to get to a point of becoming hollow inside. The one thing I have learned since I have written the above paragraph is that you have several different paths you can take in life. You can choice your own path, you make your own decisions, but when you continually have your past as your path, you can not direct yourself in the right direction. Time has proven to me that memories may fade but they do not die, the pain will follow you, no matter what you do to forget it. Horror is the factor, pain is the product and destruction of ones self is the ultimate pleasure to gain. You are nothing more than chest piece that is moved from moment to moment until you realize that you are not the one in control. Life allows you to choice, yes, but it also allows you to destroy much more in half the time.
Torture, where I live now, is allowing yourself to continue in ways you can not control. Continuing is destruction if the cycle can not be broken. Destruction is my disease, the ultimate demise of ones soul.
PkS © 2004
Constellation
Constellation
The earth, the wind, the moon and the stars
For each and everyone…who ever you are
This is my wind that I speak so softly
This is my breath that I give to you gently
For each drop of sand I lay before you
I reach more towards the moon in its glory
Following my heart to the depths of your sea
I sprinkle my warmth on countless evenings
I share my thoughts with you even as we speak
I open my arms for you to reach me
I wait for a signal of your love to bounce back
I follow your movement in the waiting shadows of its past
Each star is a representation of my love I cast
Shining down onto you in a weather beating forecast
Each droplet of water that runs down my face
Is caught in your sweet loving embrace
The moon and the stars have aligned in our favor
The earth and wind speak so freely of our nature
You have grasped my tears that flow like the river
You have taken me out of the shallow water
The earth, the wind, the moon and the stars
The have aligned to show us both who we are
They formed together to draw their strengths
They send us both a sign of our love and inter faiths
PkS © 2004
The earth, the wind, the moon and the stars
For each and everyone…who ever you are
This is my wind that I speak so softly
This is my breath that I give to you gently
For each drop of sand I lay before you
I reach more towards the moon in its glory
Following my heart to the depths of your sea
I sprinkle my warmth on countless evenings
I share my thoughts with you even as we speak
I open my arms for you to reach me
I wait for a signal of your love to bounce back
I follow your movement in the waiting shadows of its past
Each star is a representation of my love I cast
Shining down onto you in a weather beating forecast
Each droplet of water that runs down my face
Is caught in your sweet loving embrace
The moon and the stars have aligned in our favor
The earth and wind speak so freely of our nature
You have grasped my tears that flow like the river
You have taken me out of the shallow water
The earth, the wind, the moon and the stars
The have aligned to show us both who we are
They formed together to draw their strengths
They send us both a sign of our love and inter faiths
PkS © 2004
Thursday, March 18, 2004
Clipped Wings
Clipped Wings
Clip my wings so I can not fly
Clip my spirit so I can not try
Clip my sanity so I can not find
Clip my world so I can not die
Take me away from this god forsaken place
Take me away from theses evils that built up into pain
Take me away so I find who I truly am
Take me away so I find earths beauty in a shielded hand
Bound me from the evils I do upon myself
Bound me from the thoughts that take overwhelm me so well
Bound me from the screams that follow me into sleep
Bound me from the depths of my own mental well being
Let me fly with the wind with no care in the world
Let me fly with the air that is breezes in the clouds
Let me fly with the angles that watch over many of us
Let me fly with the breath that has bound both of us
Let me find my way back from where I am today
Let me find my own way to fight the evils that have risen from my pain
Let me find my own road, my own path as in life
Let me find the demons that haunt me every night
Clip my wings so I can learn to fly again
Clip my wings so I can teach my spirit to at least try again
Clip my wings so I can find the sanity I lost so long ago
Clip my wings so I can let my world begin again with a tolerance and no ego…
PkS © 2004
Clip my wings so I can not fly
Clip my spirit so I can not try
Clip my sanity so I can not find
Clip my world so I can not die
Take me away from this god forsaken place
Take me away from theses evils that built up into pain
Take me away so I find who I truly am
Take me away so I find earths beauty in a shielded hand
Bound me from the evils I do upon myself
Bound me from the thoughts that take overwhelm me so well
Bound me from the screams that follow me into sleep
Bound me from the depths of my own mental well being
Let me fly with the wind with no care in the world
Let me fly with the air that is breezes in the clouds
Let me fly with the angles that watch over many of us
Let me fly with the breath that has bound both of us
Let me find my way back from where I am today
Let me find my own way to fight the evils that have risen from my pain
Let me find my own road, my own path as in life
Let me find the demons that haunt me every night
Clip my wings so I can learn to fly again
Clip my wings so I can teach my spirit to at least try again
Clip my wings so I can find the sanity I lost so long ago
Clip my wings so I can let my world begin again with a tolerance and no ego…
PkS © 2004
30 Seconds
For anyone who might have missed what really happened... The truth has finally been expressed in 30 seconds!
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